Nick and I have spent the past six nights together, either at his place or mine. We didn’t have sex every night, but just his company kept me satisfied. We got to know one another a lot better. I found out so much about him that I never knew about. For instance, I had no idea that when he was a teenager, before he decided to follow his fashion career, he wanted to be a singer and was actually in a country band.

A country band!

He actually brought over a few pictures to show me the next night and I died. They were hilarious and he looked so cute. It’s hard to imagine him as a sixteen year old boy when I know the twenty-eight year old man.

He wanted me to meet his parents and I declined since we are keeping this whole thing a secret. He forgot about that and well, told me I would meet them one day. I’m still not sure what he meant by that but Lily told me that was a good sign. She said that it meant that he was actually planning future events with me that included his family.

That started to freak me out.

It didn’t freak me out as in commitment, but just in the fact that he thinks this little thing we have going on may lead somewhere. It could if things were simple but it’s not. They’re not simple at all. In fact, it’s very complicated.

Two days ago, my father came over early that morning to tell me that he had to fly into New York City for a day. He said he tried to call but nobody answered. I was scared shitless because Nick was in my bedroom, asleep in bed. Luckily enough, it all worked out.

Everything is great with everything except I’m dying to tell someone about Nick. Lily knows and Jay knows, but he’s basically a stranger and she knows too much about me. I want to talk to someone who knows me but not that well. Then, of course, I need to know I can trust them. I’ve been contemplating on talking to my mother about it. She seems to like Nick a lot and after what she told me about us making a cute couple, I think she would happy for me.

I think so anyway.

I sat in my parent’s kitchen at the bar, watching my mother baking a cake. It was something that I had only seen once and I was around ten years old. Sylvia had the day off from work and my mother took that as an opportunity to bake my father a cake. It was rare that she got into one of these moods, but watching her was highly entertaining.

She talked about Tabitha and her husband and how they were trying to have another baby but were having trouble. She told me about her sister, my aunt, who found out that she had breast cancer and they were having a big dinner the next week and wanted me to come over. I listened to her, but my mind kept drifting back to Nick and whether or not I should tell her about him.

“Erin, are you listening to me?” My mother asked. I jumped, looking back at her and smiled.
“What’s wrong?”

It was still unusual to see her actually care about me. I liked it but it was still strange. “I want to talk to you about something but I want to know that I’m able to trust you.”

“You know you can come to your father and I and talk about anything,” she said, putting the cake pan down. She pulled up another stool and sat down, facing me. “I know you never felt like you could in the past but I really wish you would now that we’re working on our relationship.”

“Well, I can’t go to Dad about this and talking to Lily isn’t the same because she knows way too much about my love life,” I said. Her eyes perked up. She looked like a three year old on Christmas morning. I began to wonder if I made a mistake by bringing it up.

“Well what is it Erin? Have you met someone that your father wouldn’t like?” she asked. She put her hand over her mouth and gasped. “Please don’t tell me it’s one of them Santani boys from that design company.”

“Oh God no,” I laughed. “It’s Nick. Nickolas as Dad calls him. You know, the one with the little girl that was here for my birthday and –“

“Thank you God,” she said, looking at the ceiling. Was she praying? What the hell was she praying for? When did my mother become religious all of a sudden. “I hoped that you two would get together because I think he’s a fine young man.”

“Mom, Daddy doesn’t want us to,” I confessed. “I told you this before but we kind of went against it.”

“How long has this been going on?”

“You want the truth?”

“Of course.”

“Before I found out he was the new designer,” I whispered. I looked around, making sure nobody else was near. “We met a few nights before at a club when Lily and I went out. I didn’t get his name or anything then, and a few nights later we met again and we instantly clicked.”

“Did you sleep together?” my mother asked. I wanted to laugh at her for having the guts to even ask that.

“No we didn’t, and the next day I had to show the new designer around and bam, it’s Nick.”

“Well did it start right then?”

“It started right after we came back from Atlanta to see, um, Erica,” I said. I felt uncomfortable for even bringing her up, especially in front of my mother. “We’ve spent the past six nights together and it’s not just about sex. I know Dad will probably think that but it’s not. Nick’s afraid of commitment like I am and we just, well, we’re not scared when we’re with one another.”

My mother smiled at me. Her eyes were welling up and I knew she was on the verge of crying. She looked happy and I don’t think I have ever seen her look at me like that except when we she found out that Daniel and I were engaged.

“I promise I won’t tell your father,” she said. I smiled in return. “This is where I can prove myself to you that I love you and I’m happy for you. I like Nick, and I think with him having a daughter and being responsible, it would be good for you.”

I smiled, leaning over to hug her. For the first time in my life, I felt like I had a mother. I felt comfortable with telling her about Nick and our relationship, or whatever it was. Hell, I still didn’t know exactly what it was.

“I swear I could kiss you all night long,” Nick whispered against my lips later that night. We stood there dancing slowly to some weird country song on the stereo in my living room. I didn’t know what it was. I had never listened to country music before unless you count Faith Hill and Shania Twain, but it was nice and slow.

I smiled back at him in return, not knowing what to say. What are you supposed to say to that anyhow?

“I told my mother about us today,” I blurted out. He froze, looking at me like a deer caught in headlights. “Relax, she’s not telling anybody. She’s happy about it. She likes you.”

“Really?” he asked, wrapping his arm around me tighter. “She always seems like she’s observing me closely when I’m around her.”

“That’s how she is Nick,” I said. I leaned up to kiss him slowly and gently on the lips. I took my time tasting his kiss until he started to laugh. “What’s so funny?”

“Everything,” he said. He took a few steps back and put his hands on top of his head. He looked like he was thinking rather deeply about something. What the hell was so funny? “I’m still shocked that we’re together and everything when it was really the last thing I ever expected when I took this job offer.”

“Together?”

“Well you know, dating I guess.”

“With your boss’ daughter or in general?”

“In general,” he said. He smiled at me and I looked away and smiled for I couldn’t help myself. “You’re just amazing.”

“Nick, you don’t have to say that stuff,” I laughed.

“I know,” he replied. He walked closer to me again and gazed into my eyes. “You’ve made me happier than I’ve been in a long time.”

“I’m glad,” I whispered. I leaned up to kiss him once again when someone knocked on my door. Who could be here at ten at night? I walked to the door, peeking outside to see Jay with Katie in his arms.

“Hey guys,” Jay said, handing Katie to me. I looked at her, wondering what to do when Nick started to laugh. “I just got called to work and I’m sorry about this.”

“It’s fine man. I’ll see you in the morning,” Nick said, shutting the door. He locked it and turned around to see me holding Katie. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, smiling at us. “She seems to like you a lot.”

“Does she talk?” I asked, looking at Nick. He nodded his head no and smiled. “I didn’t talk until I was almost two and now I can’t stop.”

“She will soon,” Nick whispered, kissing her on the cheek. “Let me go fix a bottle so that I can get her to sleep.”

I watched him as he took her diaper bag and walked into the kitchen. I was still holding her for some odd reason and she smiled back at me. That scared me a little. What did I do to deserve a smile that was as cute as that? I moved over and sat down on the sofa, holding her in my lap. I expected her to sit up and wait for Nick to bring the bottle but instead, she leaned against my stomach and closer her eyes with her head on my chest.

“She’s already asleep,” Nick said, putting the bottle down on the coffee table. I watched him as he sat down and wrapped his arm around me. “She really does like you.”

I didn’t know what to say to that? It’s not like my motherly instincts were coming out. I couldn’t even keep a pet alive much less know how to take care of a kid. Then again, why do I keep thinking about that anyway? She’s not mine – she’s Nick’s.

“Erin?”

“Yeah?” I said. I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at him. He looked a little concerned. Damn, maybe he realized what I was thinking about.

“Is this freaking you out? I can take her,” he said, moving Katie from my arms. I looked around and crossed my arms over my chest. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know,” I replied. It was true, I didn’t have a clue as to what was wrong with me. I began feeling nervous all of a sudden and questioning why I keep doing certain things like motherly instincts and commitment. What the hell was wrong with me?

“So you shared a bed with Nick and his daughter last night?” Lily asked the next day. She was at the office visiting me on my lunch hour since she had gotten out of class early. I sighed, knowing she was going to start going into the whole physiological aspect of this situation. “Erin –“

“Yeah, I know it’s not like me. I told my mother yesterday about us too.”

“Oh my God.”

“And she’s happy about it. She likes him,” I said, looking at her. “I don’t really know what’s going on,” and before I could finish that sentence my father walked in. “Hey Dad,”

“Hey Lily,” my father said, walking around the desk to hand me some papers. “Erin, you’re going to Miami this weekend and next week for that mini-Fashion Week thing. I just told Nick and I want you two to look at what the others are doing to make sure that we don’t go the route they are.”

Lily looked at me, smiling. I stared at her in return.

“So Nick and I are going to Miami for a week?” I asked. I was in complete shock. “But I thought we had that big meeting with –“

“You two are going,” he said. “Your flight information is there and I’ll brief you two on it a little later. I’m late for my lunch date with your mother.”

I watched my father as he left and looked down at the papers. My heart almost jumped out of my throat when I saw where we were staying. It wasn’t a hotel – we were staying in a beach house.

“We’re staying at a beach house,” I said. I looked up at Lily who crossed her legs as she leaned back in the chair. “I don’t know if I can handle this.”

“You’ll handle it Erin,” Lily said as I looked back at the paper. “I mean, after all, isn’t that what you’re supposed to do when you’re starting to fall in love with someone?”

I looked up at her. She had a smirk on her face and I had no idea what to say once again. This speechless impediment was beginning to piss me off.

There was no way I was starting to fall in love with a guy I’ve only known for two months. Then again, I “fell in love” with Daniel after only a month. Was that the weird feeling that I was having when I’m around him and Katie?

Maybe I am falling in love with him.